Fasting and prayer

For those of you who don't know me, I also thought I'd mention that I love God. That's important to know when I'm doing something like this...because it is inevitable that while fasting, God will be using the opportunity to supernaturally work in my life. I am expecting it. I am expecting mountains to be moved.

I woke up this morning thinking of something that happened years ago and I thought I would share the story. I was in college in Detroit at the time and chose to use my spring break to spend some time with the Franciscan's of the Renewal in the heart of the Bronx. They run a couple of homeless shelters, soup kitchens, and provide activities for kids who live on the streets...among other things. I was also contemplating the possibility of joining the order. Possibly.

Well, the Franciscan's take radical vows of poverty, chastity and obedience...none of which were so unattractive to me that I wouldn't consider it. I drove the 10 hours and was welcomed by some of the most joyfilled, beautiful women you could imagine. I was given my room with a bed and bathroom and settled in. I was up before my alarm at 4am and in the chapel for morning prayer before anyone else was awake. I was ready to serve! We ate all meals as a community and the first breakfast was great! We enjoyed toast, peanut butter, honey, nuts, yogurt, coffee and tea. A simple, beautiful breakfast. Everyone was full of joy.

We all went our separate ways in various ministries and I was helping to make beds at the homeless shelter and really worked up an appetite. We all met back at the convent to have lunch as a community. On the menu: Toast, peanut butter, honey, nuts, yogurt, coffee and tea. I was kind of hoping for a sandwich, but when in Rome, right? We continued to work all day, and I mean HARD work. I was hungry! We all met back for dinner and I was happy to hear of all the different stories from the day. Everyone was laughing. On the menu: Toast, peanut butter, honey, nuts, yogurt, coffee and tea. I wasn't laughing...and my joy vanished. I'm not kidding. That's not what I felt like eating. For three days, this was what was provided and the women were so grateful for what they had.

At the end of the first week, myself and one other sister were going to pray with a woman dying of aids in the slums. On the way, we passed a pizza joint. Oh God. I almost came unglued. I asked sister if we could stop and get some pizza. She looked at me as though I had 4 heads and said "We don't have money for pizza". I assured her that I had money and even frantically pulled out my wallet to show her. Let me buy the pizza! She explained that her vow of poverty didn't allow her to enjoy things that her brothers and sisters on the street could not also readily enjoy. We would have lunch provided at the convent. Menu: Toast, peanut butter, nuts, honey, yogurt, coffee and tea. I was beside myself and all I could think of was the pizza.

The next morning, I was in the chapel and talking to God...letting Him know that I was ready and willing to serve. If He wanted me to give up my life and serve the poorest of the poor...I was ready. I just thought I would have "heard" from Him by now. In my heart (I am not kidding), I heard the still small voice say "When you begin to think of me as much as you have thought of this pizza...then you will be ready to give your life." Whoa!

To make a long story short, I love food. A time of fasting such as this gives me the opportunity to put it on the back burner (where it belongs) and to focus on other important things. I think God also takes my little sacrifice and does great good with it. I have seen mountains move this week when joining my fast with prayer. I hope the same is happening for you. God is still in the mountain moving business.

Excuse me while I have my breakfast. On the menu: Walnuts, honey, fruit and tea.

Cooking and not eating

So, today was my first cook day in the kitchen while on this detox/cleanse. I had to be particularly mindful, because I realize that I put food in my mouth mindlessly. I can easily 'taste' 4 cookies (for doneness) without realizing I just had 400 calories....even if they ARE healthy calories.

I decided to put a plate as a 'catch all' for little extras (that would have ended up in my mouth). By the afternoon, I had 1/4 loaf of bread, two slices of veggie lasagna, rice pilaf and sauteed spinach that I gave to one of my workers to take home. She easily made a meal for two out of it.

What a wake up call.

I did have another revelation today (while watching the clock for my next 'feeding')... that I'm tired of seeing myself as someone who is in the process of getting healthier, losing those last 40 pounds etc... I was thinking back to when I finally quit smoking for good. For years I was a closet smoker, smoked on occassion, while having a drink, in social settings, only on my way home from work. Whatever I chose to call it then...I was a smoker. Period. One day, I just decided that I didn't want to be a smoker. I didn't want to be associated with it...not even with an occassional smoke. And I just quit. I am not a smoker.

I had that revelation today with food. I want to be healthy and fit. I don't want to be associated with not being healthy and fit.

This is my year darn it. I'm not making this resolution in 2011!

Well, today is Sunday...typically a day that I use to enjoy food without abandon. It's a feast day, right? I would totally avoid going out to eat altogether for these 30 day, but 2 days into it have realized that it isn't likely. My friend Maggie (who I'm bunking with for the weekend) wanted to go out for lunch. It's Sunday, right? OK. I can do this. Off we go.

It's important to note that I love food. I love going out. I love the experience, the smell, the service... I look at all the plates that pass by and wonder what their meal is like. It takes me forever to order, because I read everything on the menu, ask the waitress questions on my top 3 and carefully make my choice. I don't want to be disappointed with my meal. I say all of this, because I believe I have an inordinate love for food. Inordinate you say? Yes, disordered.

So, Maggie and I go out for lunch (and I am sweating). It was definitely a lesson in self control. I chose a Greek salad because it fit into my meal plan. True vegetables and about 3 ounces of feta (protein) with a dressing with no sugar. They brought pita breads and I sure did grab one out of the basket pretty mindlessly. Maggie said "I can't believe you're going to eat that!" The lure of the pita made me forget for a split second that I was going the month with no gluten. I was sad to put it back. Almost as sad as I was that I wouldn't be having my afternoon coffee with sugar and cream. Once back home, I wanted to take a nap...so that when I woke up it would be time for another meal, and well past coffee time.

Along with the initial cleanse (that's purpose is to jump start my new life of wellness), I have committed to exercise 5 days per week. I walked two miles yesterday and 2 miles today. It's important to note that I feel terrible. You heard me. Terrible. Getting muscles moving and eating lots of fresh fruits and drinking water, has released the toxins! They are on their way out... but not before giving me flu-like symptoms and breakouts!

Aint so bad

Well, it's 9:30 p.m. and I have finished my first day of a healthier me! It wasn't so bad. I have a bit of a headache, but not from being hungry...I'm assuming it's the flushing out of the sodium (pizza) and saturated fat (ice cream) I had for dinner last night in a panic. Ok, it wasn't a panic...it was clearly thought out!

I've had lots of friends ask questions about this "cleanse" that I'm talking about. I thought I'd take a moment to explain. A cleanse is often used (by us radicals) to jump-start our bodies into wellness mode again, particularly if you fall off the nutritional wagon (as I often as I do). The holidays killed me! I mean really. How many peanut butter balls, gallons of gravy, butt roasts and gumbo can a person consume until they are just...well, sick and tired of eating. That's exactly what I am. Tired. Sick and tired. So much junk over a period of time has me gunked up, sluggish, grumpy and a size bigger than I'm comfortable with. Get control, Molly!

So, this yoga woman asking for a cleanse to be designed for her was, for me...a sign from God Himself. And I can't believe I'm writing about it. I turned on the computer and saw that I have 4 followers! My heart skipped a beat. I really do have some accountability! I think this will work! I have gotten e-mails from friends and clients today asking how they can jump on the wagon too. I thought I'd go ahead and post the basic regulations of the cleanse that I designed...in the event that you want to feel as hungry...I mean, as good as I do right now ;)

-Drink lots of water!

-Eat 6 times per day. 3 cooked meals and 3 raw.

-3 cooked meals = -4-6oz brown rice, whole grain pilaf, quinoa or sweet potato

-3-5oz lean quality protein (chicken, fish, turkey, pork loin, lean beef)

- 6oz of true vegetable (corn and peas are a starch)

-3 raw meals = -Complex carbohydrate (from fruit or vegetable)

-Protein (natural peanut butter, 1% milk, cottage cheese, almonds, walnuts, yogurt, soy nuts).

-No caffeine, alcohol, refined sugar or gluten (from wheat products)

Sounds crazy? Let me share what my day looked like today (minus the crying over absent coffee). It wasn't so bad at all...once I recovered from my pizza/ice cream hangover.

Meal 1 = cottage cheese and pineapple (7am) with green tea and honey

meal 2 = almonds and an orange with a big glass of water. (10am)

Meal 3 = brown rice, pork loin roast, sauteed cabbage (from yesterday) 1:30pm and tea

Meal 4 = fat free Greek yogurt with honey and blueberries (5pm) and water

Meal 5 = grilled chicken, brown rice and roasted broccoli (7pm) and tea

Meal 6 = walnuts with half an apple (9pm) and water

Today only had 2 cooked meals, because I wasn't prepared. Chicken breasts cooked for tomorrow, check. Brown rice, check. Vegetable ready for cooking, check. Almonds bagged, check. Small yogurt containers, check. Feeling great...on my way! I got this licked!

Out with the old, in with the new...me!

Happy new year!

Like most people, I have made a resolution to to get healthy and fit in 2010. It's the same resolution I made in 2009, 2008, 2007 etc... For those of you who don't know me, I am a country girl from south Louisiana, a personal chef, educated in nutrition and own a healthy food delivery and consulting company (www.maryandmollysmustardseed.com). What? I struggle with the whole healthy lifestyle bit? Yes, daily. I love food and hate exercise. It's terrible. I've been all over America, helping the rich and famous, the poorest of the poor, working moms, busy singles and corporations to understand the basic concepts of good nutrition...lowering people's cholesterol, blood sugar, and blood pressure! Oh, I've seen it all. I'm a real health hero, except when it comes to myself. Healthy options aren't even something I'm attracted to. If I didn't know any better, I would always choose sausage over oatmeal for breakfast. I would love a hamburger over salad for lunch and fried chicken over brown rice would be my choice for dinner. Why am I saying that? Because I think most people are like me. And in a world where people are killing themselves over poor food choices, I'm here to say hey, we can get control of this together. I need motivation. I need accountability. I need friends for the journey. Maybe that's why I'm blogging this.

A Yoga instructor has asked me to create a 30 day all natural food cleanse for her and a few clients. I thought it was a noble effort on her part, to want to start the year off right. So, I'm going to do it too. I'm not doing it strictly for a weight loss tool, or even a feel better tool (although I'm looking forward to those benefits). What I want to accomplish (along with self control) is an attitude of health and well being. An attitude of "I'm worth the effort". I have lots of great things going for me, and I want to be around to enjoy it all. Really enjoy life.

So, here it goes. Happy new year! Happy new me!